Mississippi politics glossary

Mississippi's legislature has been in session for three months to budget for fiscal 2005-2006 (July 2005-June 2006). The House's budget and the Senate's budget are about $280 million apart; the House budget has been mostly disclosed, while the Senate's budget is not publicly known. The legislative session was supposed to end yesterday at midnight, and five minutes to midnight, both houses extended the session by 24 hours to see if they could get a budget passed.

JACKSON


The ABCs of state politics


As lawmakers continue to toil away in Jackson for the good of the commonwealth, and the commonwealth continues to count the days until the next election when it can send most of the Legislature packing, I thought it would be a good idea to publish a primer, a mini-dictionary, if you will, of some key terms the uninitiated should know in order to better understand the intricate workings at the Capitol.

Here they are:

Legislature -- This is derived from the Latin roots, "Legi," which means "do," and "slature," which means "nothing."

The Mississippi Legislature is a group of 174 people elected by voters to receive a salary, a big per diem, retirement benefits, free tickets to lots of dinners and shows and a special red-colored driver's license to get them out of speeding tickets.

In exchange, these men and women must work approximately four hours a year. Other terms you might see these days for the Legislature include impasse, gridlock, loggerheads and stalemate.

Legislative leadership -- While there are 174 members of the Legislature, all the decisions are really made by four people. Under the state constitution, these four must be from Alcorn County.

The leadership controls legislation through the exercise of its powers to assign lawmakers parking places and to decide whether they can go home early on Fridays.

Constituent -- A Latin term for lobbyist.

Revenue adjustment -- A Democratic term for tax increase.

Assessment -- A Republican term for tax increase.

PLADs -- A term for a sick, poor person. It's easier for lawmakers to consider cutting funding for "PLADs" than for poor, old Aunt Edna.

Bond bills -- State government doesn't borrow money, it "bonds." This term comes from the bonding that goes on at the golf course or the bar at Schimmel's restaurant in Jackson between legislators and bond attorneys.

When bonds are "issued," a guy in New York puts the debt on the official state credit card, which is a Visa. "Bond rating" means how nervous the Visa people are that Mississippi might miss a payment or that the card has been stolen.

Committee -- A place where bills are killed.

Legislative Budget Committee -- A group of legislators who meet each fall to create a fictitious budget, called the Legislative Budget Recommendation. Since the LBR must, by law, only spend money the state actually has, everyone ignores the LBR.

Budget Contingency Funds -- Imaginary money. Lawmakers use BCF moneys to balance most every budget.

Deficit appropriation -- Each year, lawmakers must spend real money to make up for the imaginary money they used to balance the previous year's budget, by passing a deficit appropriation.

Ways and Means -- A House committee that tries to give all the state's money to schools, charities and the occasional risky business venture.

Finance -- A Senate committee that tries to give all the state's money to big corporations.

MAEP -- A complex formula, passed by the Legislature several years ago, that requires the Department of Education to ask for $381 million more than it got the year before.

Conference committee -- Process whereby, in an effort to reach compromise on contentious legislation, leaders from the House and Senate each pick the three members they feel are least likely to agree to anything the other side says, and sends them to negotiate.

Sine die -- Latin term meaning "#!@$ you, I'm going home."

Special session -- A constitutional power Gov. Haley Barbour exercises about every two months. By law, Barbour can force lawmakers back to the Capitol, lock the doors and not let them eat or go to the bathroom until they pass what he wants.

Under this power, Barbour can constitutionally accuse lawmakers of being lazy and costing taxpayers too much in special session expenses.

I love this state. We don't have a unitary budget process; instead, the state constitution guarantees funding for certain items, such as roads, education, etc. Those all have to be funded by law before the end of June, 2005. Also, the state has an operating deficit for 2005 of about $300 million (out of an annual budget of about 3.7 billion, not counting money back from the feds, which is roughly the same amount again).

Did I mention I love this state?

We have 174 elected representatives between the two houses for a population of about 2.9 million people. That's one elected representative for every 16, 666.667 people. And we're suffering a net population loss (pop growth of -.1% or so).

God, I love this state.

There are between 1.2 and 1.8 million deer in the Magnolia State. The rate of deer population growth is about 300k annually, and the rate of deer killed by hunters is around 200k annually and declining, despite loosened limits and longer seasons. By my calculations, assuming constant growth rates in deer and human populations, deer population of MS will exceed human population of MS by calendar year 2016 at the earliest.

I love this state.

We have eighty-two counties in this state, or one county for every 35,000 people, roughly. Since we have over 100 representatives, and over 50 senators, you'd think that every county would elect at least one representative or senator. You'd be wrong, however. Due to the scandalously gerrymandered districts, drawn by our beloved Lt. Gov. Amy "Me And My Truck Vote For" Tuck, Lamar County, one of the fastest growing and most consistently screwed over counties in the state, is in seven House districts, and forms a majority in exactly zero of those districts.

I love this state.